My birthday list
That one got quite long and those are only a fraction of lessons learned. Enjoy my 31 lessons learned during my years living on this beautiful planet:
#1 Productivity isn’t about hustling 24/7 but having a balance of rest and focus time
During my studies, I learned how to be productive without sacrificing my health in the process. It was a long journey, and I wish I had known about the strategies and tools I’m using now earlier.
#2 People come and go, and that’s okay
I used to hang onto people because I thought it was a decent thing to do keep track of everyone. It was exhausting going back home, and then the need to meet all of the friends from high school.
It’s okay to have friends for some seasons, and then you grow apart (or move away). It’s way too exhausting and takes a lot of time to keep up with everyone.
Every season has different kinds of people, and that’s okay.
#3 Life’s lived in cycles and seasons
I already gave a small hint in the last point. Life is not a straight line. We live in yearly seasons, but also in our business, work, and relationships.
There’s always change (even though most don’t like it) because that’s how life is.
I used to think it always goes up and up and up, and I’ll be happier and happier and happier. This isn’t the case and shouldn’t be the goal because you’ll 100% fail.
This year started with a season of loss, but then a season of networking and meeting awesome people happened, and now I’m focusing on my business more.
Just like you need rest to balance your focus time, you will have different seasons of hard work, people, family time, sickness, death, and happiness.
#4 Negative thinking and complaining don’t help anyone
I’m living in an environment of complainers. That’s just how Austria is. It’s the only way they have something to talk about.
I catch myself complaining too. But it’s gotten a lot better over the last years because I see the beauty of life and Vienna, and I love it.
#5 Letting go and stop giving a f*ck about everything is how life gets easier
I used to care about everything and everyone. What do they think? What should I wear? What does this look like to others? What’s my next logical step? What is this celebrity doing? What should I do with these tips? …
Reading the book “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck” was a life-changer for me, and everything got so much easier.
I care less. It sounds self-centered and cold, but it isn’t. I just don’t care about useless stuff anymore and focus on the more important ones.
I have more focus on my loved ones, work, health, and happiness. And I don’t care about celebrities, gossip, politics (except for elections), or the latest series anymore.
It’s freeing.
#6 Being patient is hard, but it’s a precious skill these days
I’m still not a patient person. But I’m working hard on it because my business is testing my patience daily.
In this time now we can get almost everything in a couple of days. Ordering food, clothes, electronics, games … Everything is an order away.
But working on a mission (passion, obsession, business) is an infinite game and will never end, and that’s testing your patience.
Success doesn’t happen overnight (even though it might look like it does for some, trust me, it doesn’t).
It takes patience and consistent growth to succeed.
#7 My health and energy should be the number one priority
At the beginning of my studies, I was overwhelmed with everything I had to do, and I stopped prioritizing my health.
- drank energy drinks
- ate a lot of chocolate as snacks
- ate fast food
- didn’t take breaks
- didn’t rest
And then I was sick right after my exam period.
In the early 20s, you can survive this period, but it shouldn’t last long.
Life isn’t a sprint; it’s a marathon.
You need to keep up your energy and health for centuries. If you don’t start prioritizing it in your 20s, you will see the downfall in your 30s and 40s.
Taking care of myself in my 20s was the best decision.
#8 Taking calculated risks is needed to grow
As a cancer person I’m not typically risking a lot. I like to be in the comfort zone. But starting my business gave me a lot of opportunities to take calculated risks and I’m improving.
This year I took a risk and invested a big amount of money in a coaching program because I didn’t want to be stuck anymore in the beginner’s hell of an online business. But my experiences from my 20s made it clear that some calculated risks are worth it.
When I quit my high-paying job to study again, I calculated my future expenses and decided that my sanity and happiness are worth more than I’m gonna be losing (more like investing) in the next years.
And it was so worth it.
#9 Investing in yourself is getting you the best ROI ever
Like I wrote in the point before, I invested in myself, and it’s a 100% better return on investment than any investment in stocks or crypto. It can take years to realize it, and maybe the return isn’t valued in money, but in happiness or health.
And that’s worth more than any money I’m earning.
#10 Life is getting better every year
I don’t know why everyone is dreading turning 30. Ever since I read about personal development, my life has been better every year.
Even during COVID. Because I found my boyfriend, started a part-time job, was the president of a student NGO, and got a lot more done for my studies.
And I hear the 30s are even better. 1 year in, I can say that not much has changed, but I’m gaining momentum.
#11 Most of your life is your choice
Letting go of things I can’t change was an important lesson I learned in my 20s. And the rest and my reaction is my choice.
It’s freeing. I’m in charge of my life. I have to live with myself 24/7. Nobody else.
#12 Trusting the universe (a higher power) is freeing
At the same time as I’m in charge, I also trust the universe. I trust that life comes as it should be. I will always have what I need.
I give my all and trust that life happens as it should be.
It’s freeing. I don’t have to worry about my future. I can relax my overthinking and focus on more important things.
#13 Be kind to yourself
A few years ago, I started my morning routine, including positive affirmations I tell myself daily, and it was a big mindset shift for me.
I used to overthink, judge every step I took and every word I said, and it made me insecure and cautious. I did this to myself.
And I know a lot of introverts are doing this to themselves, and that’s why I’m writing online. It took me years to accept myself for who I am, and being kind to myself was the turning point for me.
#14 Grumpy people are just unhappy with their lives; it’s not personal
I see grumpy people every day. My boss sometimes, people on their way to work or back home…
They are complaining about something useless (read point 4 again) and wasting their precious time being grumpy. Why? Because they are unhappy with their life, and don’t want to think about it.
If this grumpiness is coming your way, don’t reply, just let them be. You’re not wasting your precious time on a useless thing either.
I usually ignore them, and sometimes I feel bad for them for having nothing better to do with their life.
#15 Be open to new opportunities and perspectives
I tend to have a strict plan on what I want in life and how to get there. But in retrospect, I was closed off to new opportunities.
I didn’t see anything else.
I just didn’t want to see it.
After doing 2 semesters abroad, visiting 15+ countries (some alone), I experienced so many amazing new perspectives. I never want to be closed off again.
I let go of fast prejudices and judgements, and I met the most amazing people from so many different cultures. I love it!
#16 Take small steps out of your comfort zone
Life is full of amazing things and places to explore. Staying in your comfort zone makes you stall in life.
Changing my profession at 23 was a big step out of my comfort zone, but I prepared myself by thinking through what the next steps were and what that meant in the long run.
Those small steps made the first day at a new university easier.
Every time I expanded my comfort zone, I grew, collected amazing experiences, and gained new confidence.
#17 Read books and newsletters that blow your mind
I have read a lot of amazing books over the last 31 years. I started with ‘Atomic Habits’ and ‘The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck’ and now read about psycho-cybernetics, feel-good productivity, focus, ikigai and introversion.
Take a look outside your usual bubble.
My favorite newsletters at the moment:
- Tim Denning,
- Justin Welsh and
- DAN KOE.
#18 Listen more to your body and intuition than to your logical thinking
I usually made decisions based on lists and logic, and I learned to listen more to my body and intuition as well.
If I invest in a coaching program, I want to make sure I vibe with the person.
If I say yes to a networking event, I listen to my body and my energy first.
The older (and wiser) I got, the more I listened to my body and energy. If I don’t feel 100% myself or that I can focus on the other person, I go home and rest instead.
#19 You are not your thoughts
I believe everything I thought for way too many years until I realized that I can change my thoughts.
Your thoughts are based on your past experiences and how you interpret them. They are not you.
#20 Growing your own garden is beautiful
I love my balcony full of fruits and vegetables. It teaches me patience, but also how beautiful nature is.
Giving me delicious food just by taking care of it a bit.
#21 Enjoy life because time is limited
Losing people puts life into perspective.
Time is limited. In the 20s, we don’t care yet.
I’m not waiting anymore to do something.
I’m growing my business now. I’m going to visit my friends in Mexico this year. And I’m saving for my dream and taking the first steps getting there every day.
#22 Being happy and successful isn’t about things
Things can make you happy temporarily, but in the end, it’s just a pain in the a*s if you have too much of it.
It also takes time to care for it, find space for it, and then let go of it.
I don’t measure success by how many things I have.
I measure success by how happy I am with where I am in this life and with whom and what I’m spending it.
Which brings me to the next point:
#23 Time with people is more valuable than any gift they could give me
I spend my birthdays with my loved ones. I like to do something with them instead of getting the 20th piece of chocolate.
Spending time with people is so much more valuable than anything they give me.
#24 Small steps to success are also a success
Getting a new subscriber seems small, but it’s another awesome person spending time following you and reading your stories.
Doing a masterclass with only 1 person is still a success.
#25 Play the infinite game
Success, doing something meaningful for the world and having a purpose, isn’t a finite game that just stops at 65 when you retire.
It’s an infinite game. My mission is to help introverted women achieve authentic success and happiness. It won’t stop with 65 or when I’m dead.
I think long-term. So it’s not about making money now, but creating something consistently.
The tools, strategies, products, and internet shift, but I’ll just shift with them.
#26 You can learn any skill; don’t believe your limiting beliefs
I thought I couldn’t lead because I’m too quiet. Then I led.
I thought I couldn’t study architecture because I’m not creative enough. Then I graduated.
I thought I couldn’t be in a room with successful female entrepreneurs because I thought I didn’t have anything I bring to the table. Then I joined.
As long as your beliefs are limiting you, you won’t achieve it. So don’t believe them anymore!
#27 Being introverted is a beautiful way of living
I used to think something is wrong with me because I’m quiet, and everyone cool isn’t.
Now I’m a happy, quiet person, because I love my peace and calmness.
I listen. I care. I’m calm. I love to read. I love to go for walks.
I take care of my energy. I’m empathic.
#28 Go for a walk in nature more often
Growing up, I didn’t appreciate that there was a forest right behind my home. Now I love going for walks, listening to the sounds, and enjoying the silence.
#29 Working a 9-5 isn’t safe, healthy, or the goal
I still work a 9-5 job, but I changed my mind about it.
Growing up, our parents and grandparents stayed at the same company for decades. It was the goal. It was safe.
My first job after graduating from college almost got me depressed. It was well-paid but a useless job. It’s not about family or safety anymore, because companies aren’t anymore.
It’s about finding work-life balance, a purpose, and kind colleagues.
I even go further and say work should be your life if it’s the thing you love and are obsessed with. That’s why I’m growing this business, and writing this text to you on my birthday.
I’m obsessed with my mission.
#30 You don’t need motivation to start; start, and it will come
For years, I thought I was lazy because I couldn’t find the motivation to start.
“If I really wanted it, I would’ve found the motivation already…”
What I learned is that motivation and inspiration come from starting. You start something new or a task, and while doing it, you’ll get motivated to continue.
It’s not about being lazy or procrastinating. It’s about starting.
Just doing it for 5 minutes. And then you can continue if you found the motivation.
#31 Your life doesn’t end with 30, every year it gets better
I thought that with 30, I have to have it all figured out:
- the man
- the career
- the kids
- the house
It’s just a stressful mindset. You’re not old. Your clock is not ticking (the average age to get babies is around 35 now).
And you’re never too old to change or start something new.
Your life = your path.
Stop stressing about your age!
Bonus point:
Don’t start a newsletter like this a day before your birthday. It takes longer than expected, and you have the pressure to publish it on your birthday.
Start a week before (at least)!
Your Power Action Step Today
Do one more thing this week to take care of your health. Exercising, going for a walk, getting a massage, eating healthy…
Whatever adds to your health this week, please do it!
You only have this body, and it’s aging fast.
Less Stress. More Time. Less Overwhelmed!
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