A Guide to Taking Charge of Your Life
Are you unhappy but not changing anything in life? You are stuck in your comfort zone!
I recently read “What is that you love about your life? And why are you not changing the things you don’t?”
It got me thinking because I hear a lot of people complaining (and I’m also one of them) that they are not happy. They hate this, they hate that… But then why aren’t you changing something?
It’s about this not so loved word: comfort zone!
- We are stuck in it.
- We are comfortable in it.
- We are used to it.
- We don’t want it to change.
But if you are not happy in your comfort zone then you have to change something!
Only complaining will make you miserable and unhappy. The great thing about life and having responsibility for it: you can change it!
“Champions never complain, they are too busy getting better.”
— John Wooden
Ask yourself: “What is that you love about your life?”
And then change the things you don’t!
Easier said than done, right?
If this question is a little too hard or real for you at the moment, then let’s do a small exercise:
Close your eyes and envision your perfect day. Without decreasing your expectations. Fantasize your perfect day without limitations.
- What are doing after waking up?
- What do you have for breakfast?
- How do you spend your time during the day?
- Who do you spend it with?
- How do you relax in the evening? And with whom?
- Where are you?
- What do you feel?
- What do you look like?
- How does the air smell?
Write down your perfect day so you don’t forget it!
Then comes the hard part (which is actually easy): changing the things that don’t align with your perfect day.
“To improve is to change; to be perfect is to change often.”
— Winston Churchill
Start with small steps
Start with changing your breakfast. Eat the breakfast you envisioned.
Small tiny steps are the key to achieving your goal of the perfect day. It can feel huge or impossible to reach it but if you believe in yourself and work on it step by step you can get there!
For example, on my perfect day, I’m working on my passion projects in the morning. I will have a small office in my house (next to the water), I will work on a beautiful residential building project or on my online writing business to help people improve.
To be able to achieve that I’m frequently writing online every day. I’m interacting with people on Twitter, and improving my skills with online courses. I’m also working on my Master’s degree and trying to learn as much as possible in my part-time job for the future.
My present days are not perfect. But I spend it with the people I love more, and I know what helps me get nearer to my goals and what keeps me from it.
“You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.”
— Martin Luther King Jr
Your vision of your perfect day is the goal
The great thing about life is: you can decide to change it!
You want to get to your perfect day: so you decide to get there!
It is as easy as it sounds.
For example, you are healthy and fit in your vision: you decide to eat better, do workouts, and remove unhealthy things from your life.
You envisioned a goal and if you really believe and want to achieve it: you decide to get to it!
Again: you are in charge of your life!
“Many people want to change their life, but they are not willing to change their choices, and ultimately this changes nothing.”
— MJ DeMarco
Leave the victim role
“But I can’t change because I have a family….”
“But I can’t because I cannot afford it…”
“But I can’t because all my friends are…”
Stop it! Stop finding excuses on the outside!
You decide. You decide if you want to be healthy for your family. If you have a partner, he or she makes decisions with you, but you still have your own life, you can make decisions for yourself.
If your friends don’t support your change: they are not your real friends.
People come and go your whole life. Some don’t fit into your vision of the future anymore.
You are your own person. You decide for yourself!
Sometimes I have the social pressure to drink alcohol with my friends or family. It’s common to drink a beer or a shot after food (I’m living in Austria, it’s the culture 😉 But I also know it’s not a healthy habit. I either don’t go to those kinds of parties anymore or drink non-alcoholic stuff. (We have non-alcoholic beer too)
Because society tells you to do that doesn’t mean you have to.
Society tells you to go to college to become successful. But you want to start your own company instead? Do it! If you fail you can still start studying later.
Your Life: Your Decisions
Leave your victim role and your comfort zone and take responsibility for your own life.
Your past decisions led you to where you are now. You can let them go now if they don’t get you where you want to be in the future. Your present decisions are influencing where you will be in the future.
If you decide to drink a bottle of Coke every day, you will have bad teeth and health in the future. This present decision is influencing your future.
I started a daily skincare routine recently because I’m not feeling comfortable in my skin. I know if I don’t take care of it now it can get worse in the future. (I want to age pretty 😉 I made that decision for my future self. I invested in skin care products and established a routine in the morning and in the evening.
That’s how you can take charge of your life and make decisions now for a better future.
“You and only you are responsible for your life choices and decisions.”
— Robert T. Kiyosaki
You are unhappy with your life? Take charge and make decisions now for a better future and to get to the vision of your perfect day.
One tip: I visualize my perfect day/life every day as part of my morning routine. It helps you refocus on your goal.
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