A lot of people like to gossip, usually not good stuff. Why? Because there is nothing more interesting happening and they just need something to talk about.
They have nothing happening so they talk about other people.
Avoid those people. If they gossip in front of you about other people, it means that they also gossip behind your back with someone else.
It could be fun to gossip. It can make you feel better, because you feel above those people then. But is it really a good thing? No, it actually means that you have sides of you that you don’t like and by gossiping about others you distract yourself and others from your insecurities. You don’t accept your flaws or insecurities. So you reject them, bury them and distract yourself with talking about others and their flaws. Or what you think their flaws are.
The best thing you can do:
- Don’t engage
- Don’t care about what they are talking about
People will always talk about you, because their life is boring. Just leave them and let them talk.
You are doing your thing and you are living your life, based on your vision and your values.
Live Your Independent Life
How can you get rid of the need of getting the approvement of those people?
- Go into yourself and get to know you
Take your time, go to a quiet place and figure out who you are and what you want to achieve in your life. You can meditate and just listen to your heart.
2. Define your values
What are the values you want to live by? This can be specific or broad, whatever your heart is telling you.
Mine include freedom and family. Freedom from boring work and strict work times and locations. Freedom to spend time with my family and friends, whenever I want.
3. Analyze your life based on your values
You just figured out your values which should define your life now and which should influence all your decisions.
Take a look at your life now. Does it fit to your values? If not, what is the reason and how can you change that? You don’t have to make immediate decisions now on quitting everything and everyone. Go step by step.
There are a lot of ways to change your life. Sometimes you have to keep something continuing to help you come to your goal, even though it doesn’t fit your values right now.
For example even though one of my values is freedom, I still have a job in an office with fixed (a little flexible) time and fixed location. It helps me to prepare for the future I want to have by providing me a salary and health insurance.
4. Define a life goal
From the book “Think and grow rich” by Napoleon Hill I learned that you have to define a precise goal, believe in it and then plan to get there.
So defining a life goal is like defining it for a project. It has to be smart. Have you ever heard about smart goals? Here smart stands for:
S = specific
M = measurable
A = Attainable
R = Realistic
T = Time-bound
Define your life goal based on those guidelines. This will keep you motivated and you can easily make a plan based on that.
5. Plan to get to your life you wish for
Now you have to make a plan on how to achieve your goal. What needs to change? When do you have to do what? Specify your goal by making a plan.
You can not change the people which are gossiping. But you can choose to not be one of them and live a life based on your values and not based on their opinion. They will never stop gossiping.
Choose your own life and leave the negative environment.
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